affiars with hand creams, racism, one hit wonders

so a close friend of mine just returned from her european vacation and got me nivea cosmetics!! it is no secret among those who know me that i will not leave the house without a tub of nivea hand cream.

my relationship with nivea started early in my life (if that sentence scares you, stop reading now) since then, i have been faithful to nivea and have never tried another hand cream, walked by the body shop a few times, all tempted, hot and bothered but i kept walking. okay, well that is a lie (the being faitful bit) but for a few years all i knew was nivea. in eastern europe, they literally (read: vast exageration) do not sell anything else. but by the time i decided that my relationship with nivea was suffocating and decided to branch out and see other people (read: hand creams), i was already trapped, immune to the soft and silky feel that it had on my palms. nothing else could come close.

after my attempted affairs i came home, walked to the washroom, grabbed that blue tub of nivea and looked at it with shame and slathered it on my hands. it looked so smug, surely thinking "i knew you'd come back, it was only a matter of time"

so i looked for a commercial for nivea cosmetics and found the one above, which brings me to my second point (oh look at me being all organizational and having literary flow - hm maybe not) those "kiss me i'm _____ (insert nationality)" sayings upset me, primarily because they are racist. I mean, are you implying that i should kiss you because of your nationality?

first off, who is kissing you that you would need to justify your reasoning for asking for a kiss? if your husband/wife/partner is kissing you only if you justify why they should do it then you need to send them to AA (Asexuals Annonymous) Second, is using your nationality really going to be effective? i mean "kiss me, i'm no longer a heroin addict" or "kiss me, i passed my GED at 40" those are real reasons for a smooch. Using your nationality? How very anti-globalziation of you.

ok maybe i'm just bitter because i can't relate, i've never seen a t-shirt that read "kiss me, i'm ....well from a country that no longer exists"

also, my last point (there's that literary flow), when i googled "nivea" the first thing that came up was the one hit wonder singer nivea who sang "don't mess with my man"


it's sorta my anthem ...